I was speaking with someone not too long ago and they said "People are always saying I have to change my attitude…what does that mean? If they tell me what's wrong and what they want me to change I would." I thought that this was a good subject to discuss this month.

Attitude means a personal view of something such as an opinion or general feeling about something. It also refers to the bodily posture such as a physical posture, either conscious or unconscious especially while interacting with others. It can mean an arrogant or assertive manner or stance assumed as a challenge.

Most of us can't quite put our finger on someone's attitude. It is a feeling that we receive from others through their posture, words or outlook on life.

Attitude is often the outlook someone has on life. They are unpleasant, angry or bitter. Most of the time people with attitude have a critical voice and use it liberally. They don't usually see the good in life. Although attitude can be positive most reaction is caused by negative attitude. It is their approach, outlook, position or way of thinking. Attitude usually comes from their way of behaving and interacting with others.

If someone has taken the time to tell you that you have an attitude, they are probably referring to a negative attitude. It is up to you to investigate how you are thinking, feeling or interacting with others in life. Negative attitude is not something that people want around them. They would rather ignore a person with negative attitude than try and explain exactly what needs to change to have a good attitude.

A great attitude is exuding happy thoughts.

Examine your attitude. Is it positive or negative? A positive attitude is like a magnet. People will be attracted to you and everything you say or do. If your attitude is not positive you can change it by first recognizing it, work at changing your thoughts into gratitude. Be grateful for yourself, the world you live in and the circumstances around you. You have control of your attitude...make it positive.

A great attitude changes everything...try it, you will like it, I promise.

A freak accident can show you just how precious life can be.

Sunday morning just before noon my husband decided to stake the tomato plants in the garden.

As he put in the last stake on the last tomato he slipped. He was bending over the old wooden stake and all his weight was being applied to embedding the stake. It snapped and he fell forward onto the stake. As he saw the stake coming towards his face he turned away as quickly as possible. It was not quite enough. The stake caught him and punctured his neck.

He walked into the house and simply said, "I fell." This is a man who never looses his balance. When I saw the gash in his neck I knew that medical attention was needed. He said he was fine and after we washed him up a bit, he headed back to rescue the little tomato plant he had squashed when he fell. After a little more CONVINCING we were off to the hospital. Although he was not bleeding heavily we kept pressure applied to the wound.

The medical staff kept telling us how lucky he was, a centimeter one way or the other and this accident could have been fatal. When they cleaned the wound they found he had a small wood fragment lodged close to his juggler vein. They removed it, gave him five stitches, antibiotics and a tetanus shot and we were on the way home. Thank God.

Life is so precious. As the doctor said, "it's amazing how you can live a good life and be healthy all your life and then you can be taken out attending to a tomato plant."

Household accidents are the number one reason patients are seen at the Emergency Room.

Please take care. Accidents are just that, accidents, but they too can be fatal.

Stay Well!

For the last three months Brenda has been out there spreading the word about The Women's Growth Network and the Power of Personal Growth this spring.

She offered Women's Wisdom Gatherings in a number of locations including; Brampton, Mississauga, Vaughan, Richmond Hill, Markham and Newmarket. Topics included Who Loves Me?, Turn Yourself On!, Imagine Your Potential and Getting to Know Me. Although the numbers were small, they provided a very intimate opportunity for participants to grow.

The women who attended loved the chance to work with other like-minded women and each session became a learning opportunity for all those who attended.

Brenda spoke at the Esthetique Spa International Show at the Toronto Convention Centre and introduced the Power of Personal Growth to Spa Owners, Estheticians, and Hairdressers. They loved learning how they could add more personal growth to their experiences with women.

As well Brenda had a wonderful time introducing Administrators to the world of Personal Growth at the Administrative Professionals Conference.

Over 100 women did the Growth Sheet "Getting to Know Me" and now they can clearly articulate their needs, wants and expectations from each relationship around them.

Finally Brenda had the opportunity to celebrate Professional Administrators Week at the Winners Head Office where she did a four hour session with their administrators, introducing them to the WGN and the Power of Personal Growth.

Keep Growing!

Very close to my 40th birthday I started having night sweats and hot flashes. Oh joy, I had begun menopause. Not believing it, I had it confirmed through blood tests with my family doctor. Since I started my menstruation early, it was not surprising to think I would start menopause early.

Hormone Replacement Therapy was discussed but this was not an option I wanted to pursue because of all the information I heard and read about its risk of causing cancer. Not for me. I decided to be brave and ride it out.

After a few years I went to a women's hormone specialist and started taking estrogen and testosterone creams. It was quite the experience taking testosterone. I realized that men simply can't help those primal urges...it's the testosterone. It wasn't my answer.

Each time I saw someone they would ask, "how many times do you sweat at night?" I didn't know, all I knew was I was waking up constantly burning up and drenching the bed clothes. In fact, I had a towel on my bed where I lay, a towel on my pillow for my head, a towel down the front of my nightie to absorb my chest sweat and finally a towel down my back to absorb my back sweat. It was not a pretty sight. It was embarrassing for me as I could not control the sweat. My husband was feeling my pain.

I needed a way of measuring the frequency of the night sweats. I put a box of tissues beside my pillow and each time I awoke sweating, I would grab a tissue, use it to absorb some of the sweat on my forehead and then put it under my pillow. To my surprise in the morning I was averaging 9 - 12 saturated tissues.

My medical doctor said I had to live with it and hopefully it would go away someday. I worked with naturalists and Chinese medicine doctors and still no relief.

A few weeks ago I was searching the Web for some answers, AGAIN. I found an article that mentioned night sweats are symptoms of some major diseases such as Tuberculosis or Leukemia (http://www.aafp.org/afp/20030301/1019.html). At the very bottom of the page was a statement about over bundling. Over bundling, this was new. It started me thinking about what I was wearing to bed, and the bedding I had on the bed. I was sleeping under a light-weight goose-down duvet. It was worth a try.

The next night I slept under a flannel sheet only. I had NO night sweats that night. I couldn't believe it. I lay down, closed my eyes and woke up the next morning. It was a miracle. I was dry.

For the last couple of weeks I have been sleeping instead of sweating. I encourage all those women who are having severe night sweats to look at their bed clothes. They may hold some answers.

Organic recycling. Who knew? I heard about this new way to recycle kitchen waste but, I always dreaded the idea of handling garbage.

My parents keep everything. My mom had a tower of styrofoam meat trays and empty bottles, just in case. I grew up during the "throw-away society", where you didn't bother fixing, mending or repairing most things, you simply threw them out and bought anew.

As my son went through school, he advocated recycling and we have been doing it faithfully ever since. First the blue box, then the grey box then we added another blue box, and we have a garden composter and kitchen garburator.

At a recent networking function, there was a lady promoting worm farming using organic kitchen waste. Now that was different.

Then a couple of weeks ago, we in Brampton, were introduced to Organic Recycling. It came with a green bin which you can roll to the curb, a smaller kitchen bin and a magnet for our fridge that indicated what we could and could not put into this new compostable container. I needed to get over my negative thoughts towards handling garbage. It is good for the environment, it will save the landfills. Although I don't understand how the landfills will decompose, if we don't put compostable stuff in to help the process. But I'm no expert.

Anyway, since we started it has been amazing how little "garbage" we produce. Everything is now either recyclable (the majority) or compostable. We now take less than a grocery bag of garbage to the curb each week.

We use the plastic liner bags (compostable) and all the scraps go in there (instead of the garbage or garburator). Tissues, napkins, paper towels, old fruits, vegetable cuttings, leftovers, the list goes on and on. It's wonderful.

We quit using the bins. Now we purchase Green Bags (compostable), Blue Bags (recyclable) and a very small garbage bag. These bags may cost us a few pennies, but now I don't have to run down the street on a windy day and pick up those dirty bins before anyone else gets home.

Feel good about your garbage - RRRC

A couple of months ago, I woke to discover a significant lump on my breast and to boot it was painful. I immediately went to my doctor and he examined me. Yes indeed there was a lump and again he confirmed that it was very painful.

He suggested that we get a ultra sound done at the Breast Clinic of the hospital. When I called to make the appointment it was going to be 8 weeks. Ehhhhh!

I thought about where it had come from and why it was there. Then I thought about the bras that I had been wearing. You know those pretty ones that provide us "older - mature" women with uplifting support. Heck they even make our boobs look perky. The way they make us look like that, is of course with underwires.

I've heard about underwires being a problem but I didn't believe it until I realized that I have been wearing them way too much. Why, because I liked the way my figure looked. I liked the way my clothes fit. It was nice to feel perky again.

Since I had time before I was to see what it was, I decided to stop wearing these perky bras and return back to my old faithful bras - the less glamourous one. I am happy to report, as well as having no more lump, the pain disappeared.

I'm no expert on bras, boobs, or breasts, but I have lived with mine for a very long time and I will be much more aware of the pressures that are being applied to my dear tender breasts from underwire bras in the future.

In fact, my quest now if to find a great bra that has full support (so I still look perky) with no underwire.

I have learned my lesson and will not wear underwire bras on a regular basis again and a I strongly urge you all to rethink the underwire thing.

I did have my appointment at the hospital and they told me that they do not have any information about the hazards of underwire bras. But did suggest that we only wear them for a short time for special occasions.

Have a perky month!

I can't believe the number of women who I've talked to who are so THANKFUL that the holidays are over. What's that all about?

Have our busy lives taken over Christmas? Would we rather just continue with our emails, businesses, chores and other busy stuff rather than taking some time to enjoy the spirit of the season with friends and family.

Maybe we put too much pressure on ourselves to really enjoy the "spirit of the season". I don't even remember Boxing Day. I think I was so burnt out, spent, exhausted or whatever you want to call it. I was just thankful it was over.

Yes the relatives came and went but it was more than that. It was the preparations that tired me out. Thinking about the gifts needed, wishing and stressing that I couldn't buy what they REALLY wanted. Then there was buying, wrapping and trying to find the time to do the exchanging. Next, it was time to look at the house as guests would (yikes). They, of course, would see everything, so I had to be extra diligent. Then there was putting out the bread for stuffing and preparing the turkey for the big meal the night before the big event. Of course it never fails we forgot the fresh brussel sprouts and the tomato juice...oh well.

I was so tired from getting ready and executing Christmas that I never really got time to enjoy it. Then after I recovered, the New Year's Eve pressure was on.

Next is making my resolutions, goals, objectives and so on, because that's what you do for the new year. I don't know about the rest of you, but I just want to stop go, go going. I don't seem to be getting anywhere except getting busier and busier.

Now that the holiday season is over and all the decorations are packed away I can finally get back to my busy, busy world.

The consensus seems to be if you have small children, or grandchildren then as the song says, Christmas is for children. If you are in the transition stage then a beach and a palm tree seems like a great way to have a very merry Christmas.

Happy New Year! Believe that 2007 will be your most profitable yet!

Tis the season to haul up all those old boxes of holiday decorations from the basement and turn our regular house into a warm and wonderful place to celebrate the holidays with friends and family.

Oh, to make the yuletide jolly. Each year I struggle with the idea of finding the time, energy and desire to do all the tasks that Christmas decorating entails.

A month will go by so fast, we won't even notice the house is not decorated. There's no little one around this year.

If I do, I know that it will spark discussions as to whether we should put lights down the banister or just put up some garland (the easier solution). And what about the tree - not whether it will be real or artificial, but whether to move furniture to erect the large artificial tree in front of the window or just put up a little (2 foot) tree on a table in the dining room. These discussions and decisions go on for hours. Fa la la la la la la la la.

It was totally different when our son was younger. It was a given and we even looked forward to it. In fact, we would put it on the calendar and anxiously wait for the decorating weekend to arrive. Times change as you age and your children age. The desire to deck the halls is not what it used to be.

You begin to question whether decorating the house is worth all the effort? Will it make me feel differently about the season? Will it help me get into the "spirit" of Christmas? Is it necessary?

So I decide... let me start with a couple of things. Since the outdoor lights are glowing, at least I need to find the wreath for the front door...and so it starts.

Well as expected, once I put on my old favourite Christmas collection of songs and my son came home from Teacher's College talking about Christmas and what a wonderful time of year it is, the mood struck.

Afterward the house felt so much warmer and the feelings of Christmas have begun to set in. So go ahead, deck the hall, the windows, the bathrooms, heck, even the kitchen. Tis the season to enjoy the warmth, glow, and the miracles of Christmas.

A couple of weeks ago I had to put my beloved pet Sparky down. He was a spectacular cameo Persian, which means that he was pure white with a few touches of cameo colouring.

He was our pet for over 22 years. When he came to us he was so small he would fit into the palm of my hand and as beautiful as one of those Royale kittens. My son was three at the time and we allowed him to name our new kitten, needless to say Sparky was the name that was chosen. It never really suited him but he was our family pet and I often referred to him as Sparkles or Pumpkin.

As he grew he blossomed into an incredibly beautiful animal. He thought he was beautiful, always sitting just out of reach and always in the perfect pose for a photograph. Sparky was more than just a cat, he was my connection with love. Sure I had my husband and my son, but Sparky was the one I went to when I was hurt, angry or just needing a little emotional soothing. He was my outlet to love unconditionally and he loved me back everyday in subtle ways.

He had a gentle cry and used it sparingly. As he grew with the family he was often dressed in costume and put in compromising positions. When his health started to fail 10 years ago we introduced another family member - Sasha, an incredibly cute Bichon Frise. Sparky never liked her and had no use for this "dog" around the house. Quite often Sparky would bite Sasha's hip and Sasha would drag him around the house. They learned to co-exist but never become friends. Sparky always ruled the house and this new addition would not change that.

Over the last few years Sparky lost his sight and eventually his will to do anything. We had stools to help him get on the couch and extra litter boxes but when he lost his balance, we knew it was time.

Goodbye my pet, my love, you will always be lovingly remembered and deeply missed.

Three little words that can change your life. Usually people say the three most powerful words are "I Love You" however sometimes it is easier to say that you love someone else than it is to say you love yourself.

Last month we invited our WGN Personal Growth Sheet subscribers to explore how much they liked themselves. Not everyone can make this clear powerful statement so we asked the tough questions… What do you like about you?

Maybe it's your eyes, smile, nails, knees or ankles. There may be many things you like about yourself and yes there will be a few you won't like but that just means they need more or less attention. Focus on the feeling that is associated with liking that part. It probably puts a smile on your face. Imagine if you were to like everything about you, imagine the smile you would have and the great feeling that would radiate from the inside.

What about your brain, is it your creativity, organization abilities, or your ability to reason. Then there is your personality, maybe you like that you are fun, outgoing, humourous, talkative or adventurous.

If you are coming up a little short in the "I like myself" department, here's a simple exercise that will change your life. Instead of growling at or ignoring every mirror you see, stop and look directly into your eyes and say "I like myself", give yourself a nod and move on with what you were doing. Don't look at all the things you don't like, just look into your eyes. Once you have mastered that, start saying it to yourself 1000 times a day. When you feel brave enough, say it out loud to your family members. Ask them if they can say it, if not you can play the "I Like Myself" game with each other.

Being able to confidently say "I Like Myself" is not arrogant, conceited or anything close. It is confirmation to yourself that you like yourself. It's a good thing. Now that you are self-assured that you like yourself, you may want to move to the next step… saying… I love myself. It's not too far of a stretch is it?

Okay let's loose the sarcasms and excuses and get down to it. You can complain all you want but to keep your body slim, trim and physically fit you have to move it and keep moving it. Last month we invited our WGN Personal Growth Sheet subscribers to explore making fitness fun. First, you have to figure out what you like to do, because if you try and do something you don't like it will never become fun. Here are some suggestions for you to consider:

Music to Move - Crank up some of your favourite music and let loose, make that body move. Now that sounds like fun! I'm sure if you added some proper fitness training techniques you'll love the results.

Video Vigour - Get a video of other well endowed women working out with a celebrity such as Richard Simmons or Jane Fonda which my 85 year old Aunt uses 3 times a week.

Commercial Freedom - Set up a stationary bike, a rowing machine or treadmill in front of the TV and start by jumping on during the commercials, then you can work up to the entire show (I haven't made it yet, still working on it though).

Add a Partner - Everything is better with a partner, even working out. Find something that you both enjoy and make a commitment to spend some quality time together getting fit, it won't hurt the relationship either.

What Are You Looking At? - Put up a few dream pictures or funny cartoons, anything that can help you keep motivated. Try decorating for results.

Variety is the Spice of Life - Put a different activity that you would like to try on your calendar each month, at least you will be thinking a little more of how you can make fitness more fun. The next step is to do it!

September is often seen as the beginning of a new year. Start this year off right. This way when you reach the next calendar year, you'll be well on your way to reaching your 2007 goal to be a more beautiful, slimmer, trimmer and healthier you. Remember you are doing this for you, no one else. Incorporate a little fun into your fitness routine.

Why is that some people can smell a flower and receive the wonderful gift of fragrance and another can sniff the flower and smell nothing. Is it that some are more attuned than others?

It seems after a while our senses, such as touch, taste, smell, hearing and sight, dull and get weaker. Often, we are not as aware of the details around us as we could be. We become accustomed to tastes, sights, sounds, and smells. We get into a rut. Recently I heard someone say that the reason we have to wear glasses to bring in focus details, is that as we get older we realize details are not as important.

To increase our level of consciousness we must increase our awareness or wake the senses. Waking the senses is about increasing life, growing if you will.

Last month we invited our WGN Personal Growth Sheet subscribers to explore waking their senses. We explored each of the five senses and encouraged subscribers to explore waking their senses.

For touch we suggested you touch, stroke and really feel different things such as fabric, furs (real or faux), plants, foods and metals. Each have their own feel, their own unique properties. The slower we touch the more aware we will become.

For taste we suggested that you try five different substances that you have never tried before. They may be foods, drinks or candies. Try something new such as an Asian dish, or a Indian dish on a menu at a restaurant. You just might discover that you enjoy these flavours. You won't know unless you try.

So go ahead, awaken your senses and become more aware. You'll love the experience and you just might be pleasantly surprised.

Inhale life, taste its sweetness and enjoy the journey.

Isn't that a loaded question! But a fair question to ask of yourself. Who loves you for you? Not just for your good looks, or your large bank account, but you, your true authentic self. Many may say, my parents, my partner, my kids, or maybe even a pet. It really doesn't matter who or how many ways you are loved it is the quality not quantity that counts. The important thing is that you are loved. And believe me you are loved.

Last month we invited our WGN Personal Growth Sheet subscribers to explore the different relationships that provide love in our lives. We then went a step further and asked why does each of them love you and how does their love make you feel. An enlightening exercise.

But the most important love is the love we give ourselves. For many this is the most difficult love to accept. We know that we are not perfect, probably far from it, but we don't need to beat up on ourselves either. We are the most important person in our lives and we must understand, accept and love ourselves first. Have you said "I love you" to your reflection lately?

We need to love ourselves as we would a small child or young animal. Speak, touch and think about ourselves in a loving manner. Do nice things for ourselves, go places that make us feel good or buy ourselves a little present or flowers once in a while. Find ways to show ourselves that we indeed love ourselves. If we don't love ourselves, how can we expect others to love us.

Recognizing and understanding the love that you receive is something to be truly grateful for. Remember, "the more you give, the more you get" is one of those sayings that says it all. Give love and you shall receive it.

"To be loved, be lovable." Ovid

We are very special creatures, we often disregard our needs, wants and our expectations. We settle, accommodate and accept what we are given.

We may want a million dollars, or to be happy all the time, or at peace with others or a better more positive world to live in. We need to be loved, cared for and appreciated. We expect that each of our relationships will give us what we need and want. But if they don't know what they are, how will this happen?

We often expect, anticipate and count on the fact that we will be disappointed but rarely do we logically tell others about our needs, wants or expectations. We often simply accept what we receive and justify it in our minds. I believe we need to express ourselves to all those that we have relationships with. Express that we want, need, and expect more from our significant others, children, parents, and friends. They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Take the time to know yourself, to figure out what you want, need and expect from different relationships in your life. Then gently share these with your loved ones and watch miracles happen.

Well it is officially Spring. The air is clean and clear, the days are warm and sometimes a little wet. The birds are returning to delight us with their songs.

I have enjoyed listening to each of the snow birds as they returned, first the robins, then the blue jays, the cardinals and of course our Canadian geese. Each one sings such a beautiful song that we should take a few minutes to just listen.

I'm sure you are all enjoying watching the grass as it begins to green, shrubs are beginning to bud and trees are slowly awakening.

One of the best features of my home office is that my desk is surrounded by floor to ceiling windows. It is wonderful, however Spring provides a major distraction. I find it fascinating to watch the birds and the squirrels as they chase each other. One just slightly more frisky than the other. There seems to be a race to catch love. I'm sure this where the saying "Love is in the air" comes from. Pairs of birds maneuver through branches at lightening speed, squirrels scamper and scurry and sometime fly from one tree to the next. Neighbours walking more, kids playing in the street. It is a wonderful time of the year.

As I watch a pair of morning/evening doves sit together side by side on the top of a fence just loving each other. I realize that Spring is a magical time of year. It's the time to renew your love of nature by being part of it and it's the time to renew your love for your family and your life.

I wonder if that what is most important. Chasing, finding and loving each other.

Today I traveled with two of my Aunts to Uxbridge to visit another Aunt who is dying from lung cancer. It really made me realize that life is precious and fleeting. In the past three years I have lost four members of my family. This family was made up of very unique individuals, all bringing something different to my life.

I realize more and more how important the people you love are in your life. It's sad that sometimes we never take the time to say what we need to say. I guess we think that there will always be time to say what we feel but when they are gone they're really gone. The opportunity is lost forever.

I took that opportunity with my mother a couple of months before she died, it was a cleansing experience for me. I talked deeply with my father during the last few days of his life and told him, easily and often, that I loved him. Sadly those were words that had never been spoken before. When my uncle was in the hospital after his second stroke and could no longer speak or walk, I told him how I always knew he was in the wings of my life and that I always saw him as a second dad, this was only a few weeks before he passed.

As I spoke those words of love to all of my loved ones tears poured from each of us. Tears of love. The words I spoke with each of my family members were the most precious words I have ever spoken. These words touched, comforted, cleared the mind, healed the soul and most of all will be remembered throughout my life.

I will have those memories forever and I'm so glad that I took the time, and found the opportunity to tell each of them how I really felt and how much they meant to me.

Family is what's important. Tell them what they mean to you. Tell them how they influenced you, how they touched your life, don't leave words of love on your lips….share them!

Don't you just love when someone asks "are you ready for some criticism?" Does your heart sink or does your back stiffen? Your self-talk begins - it sounds bad. You begin to question yourself - what have I done wrong now. Brace yourself, here it comes. This all happens in a nanosecond.

Oh by the way, how many of us could honestly answer yes?

Criticism is a tough thing to hear, but sometimes it is just as tough for others to tell you. Usually the message is given from a place of love. The person feels so passionate about an issue that they need to express it to you. You must love yourself enough to say "Yes, I'm ready, help me improve". Most of the time when we listen and understand where the criticism is coming from, it provides enlightening insights of another's perspective. Listen, and love the learning.

Recently this happened to me, I so proudly sent pictures of the WGN display to a dear friend and then the dreaded question came. "Oh...are you open to some criticism? Okay…., I think I'm ready to hear some criticism. In her kind gentleness, she conveyed to me that my image could be seen as old-fashioned, not modern and contemporary, like I wanted. It also didn't match the essence of the WGN web site. It was time to raise the bar on the way we presented the WGN.

She agreed to go shopping with me and help me choose a better image for our display. Wow what a difference, it took me a couple of tries but I get it now. You'll will see pictures in our next newsletter. We are now simplistic and modern thanks to a little bit of criticism from a friend. So, next time someone asks you if you want to hear some criticism, say yes, right away, avoid all the self-talk and be open to new ideas...it will be worth it.

Receive it as it was meant - to improve you!

I was so stressed out trying to get all my work done so I could find the time to shop for those "perfect" gifts. Worrying that there would be enough presents under the tree. Am I exceeding my budget? Are all the decorations up, did I forget to mail anyone a Christmas card, do I have everything done? Then there was Christmas dinner… who should we invite, who gets along with who, where will they be seated, do I have enough food? Is anyone bringing desert or do I have to bake cookies (yeah we all have time for that). Will everyone enjoy the menu selected, who has food allergies? What did I forget? It continued, where will we be spending Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Years Eve, New Years Day.

I'm really happy the holidays are over. I've eaten too much, I've worried too much and I've probably made too many resolutions, but never mind, 2006 is upon us. It's a brand new year with new hopes, dreams, goals and plans.

Happy New Year! May it be abundant and prosperous for all!